"The Fine Print", by Michael Schrader

JUST BECAUSE YOU DON’T BELONG TO A COVEN DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE NOT A WITCH

(Written and posted 01 November 2010)

My daughters and I were talking about homosexuality yesterday, and specifically whether or not a person is born homosexual or whether it is a choice. My answer was shocking to them, not because of what it was, but the wholesale change in my views that it reflected. My daughter quickly pointed out how much different my views are than what they were two years ago. It was interesting that my daughter would say that, as I had told my wife earlier in the day that I was not the same man that she knew two years ago, that parts of my personality that had been long suppressed were now exposed for the world to see. Other people who know me have also commented about the change. Personally, I think change is good, as it shows the ability to grow and adapt. There is nothing more frustrating to me than a person who refuses to change-ever! And I know quite a few people who fit that description.

Two years ago, I did something that I’d never done in twenty-something years as a card-carrying voter – I voted Republican. If you read back at that time, you will find a person who was very bitter towards the Democratic Party. There were two primary reasons for my bitterness. First, I thought it was underhanded and sneaky for the local Democratic Party to recruit an eleventh-hour candidate who wasn’t even in the country to run against me in the primaries because I was not a “wink-wink nod-nod” type of candidate who would maintain the status quo and the enriching patronage that came with it. Anyone who has read me throughout the years knows that I am definitely not a status-quo kind of person, that I believe we should always keep adapting and changing. Second, I was bitter at the national party for trashing Hillary, who in my opinion was the best candidate from either party and would have made a great president. I thought then and still think that Obama is mediocre at best, but that the party got caught up in the “let’s elect a Black!” euphoria without thoroughly vetting him.

So, in 2008, for the first time since I started voting in 1984, I voted for a Republican ticket. (Yes, I proudly voted for Mondale, Dukakis, Gore, and Kerry.) First, I respect McCain and his independent voting streak; he is a man that is not afraid to stand up and tell his own party “NO”. Second, he took a huge gamble a selected Palin as his running mate, a very gutsy thing to do. Third, Palin herself had a folksy charm about her. (Yes, I did get enamored by her….) That being said, as things stand now, I am glad that Obama won, even though I still think Hillary would have been a much better choice.

Why the change of heart? A change in the Republican Party. In the intervening two years, the “Tea Party” movement has hijacked the Republican Party. The Tea Party, with Palin as its leader, says that it represents true American values and the Constitution; it does not. The Tea Party represents the Ugly American, filled with vile and hatred. The Tea Party wants to trample your Constitutional rights, especially the “separation of Church and State”, and impose its rigid vision on the rest of us. When you look at a picture of a Tea Party gathering, how many minorities do you see? Zip. Zero. Nada. The Tea Party hates you, and everything you stand for. Are you destitute and on government aid? The Tea Party hates you. Are you not an evangelical Christian? The Tea Party hates you. Are you homosexual? The Tea Party hates you. Are you Hispanic? The Tea Party hates you. Are you anti-gun? The Tea Party hates you. Do you want to build a mosque? Hoo boy, the Tea Party definitely hates you. Do you believe in universal health care? The Tea Party hates you. Believe in evolution? The Tea Party hates you. Belong to a union? The Tea Party hates you. Are you a witch? Christine O’Donnell isn’t, and the Tea Party hates you.

In short, the Tea Party hates everyone that is not a Bible-thumping, Creationist, gun wielding, hetero sexual, evangelical white. In short, the Tea Party is nothing more than a mainstream version of the KKK. The Tea Party wants to round up all of those who do not think like they do and purge our country of the scourge. Of course, that would be pretty much the entire population, but hey, we must have purity! What is ironic is that the spokesperson for the Tea Party, Palin, would lose her voting rights if the Constitution were restored to the way the Founders intended, as the Tea Party wants. Of course, then Clarence Thomas would then be ineligible for the Supreme Court, being black and all. Given the Founders distaste for Catholics and Jews, we would not have any justices on the Supreme Court, which consists of only Catholics and Jews. All things science would have to be destroyed, as science is the antithesis of faith and the Bible, and if it isn’t in the Bible (the King James version, that is), then it is evil and must be destroyed. Most of the poor, uneducated masses that buy into this hatemongering would also be disenfranchised, as most do not own property.

What is interesting, is that if the Tea Party wins, and resets the Constitution to how the framers intended, then the group that will be least impacted will be the progressive intelligentsia, like me. (I am not saying that I am personally intelligent, we all know that I fail miserably there, only that I have a college degree, so I am part of “The Intelligentsia”.) I am a white male property owner over the age of 21 – the only group of people who were allowed to vote in 1789. In essence, my vote would be much more powerful under the “old” Constitution than it currently is. Hmmm.

Maybe then a Tea Party victory would be a good thing then; after all, I would become much more important. Nah. Not worth the destruction of a country. Like Christine, I am not a witch (or a warlock), but unlike Christine and her Tea Party cohorts, I do not care if you are. Maybe we should elect more witches…. Scratch that idea, then we’d be electing Palin and O’Donnell and Angle.

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