“The Fine Print”, by Michael Schrader
FROM THE MAILBAG
(Written 15 July 1998. Published in the Neighborhood Journal. Posted 06 July 2009.)
Just wanted to write and say "Bravo" for the
column, "These Dead Shall Not Have Died In Vain".(5-20-98) I might not have been as judgmental in my
assessment of the weekend warrior-enactors.
They can do whatever they want, I guess, but it is about time somebody
spoke about how ridiculous the idea of "honoring" our fallen soldiers
is by glorifying the death and destruction that took their lives. Why not glorify what they fought FOR instead
of what they fought to END?
Joe Fish,
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I normally consider myself pretty effective when expressing
myself in writing, but I seem to get writer's block every time I prepare to
respond to one of your columns.
For reasons that I don't quite understand myself, however,
the column "Are Men Really Better Than
Women?" (7-8-98) seems comparatively easy to respond to, so here is my
stab at it.
Referring to your interpretation of the comments of others
regarding your first son, I am confident that people have asked that because
you now have at least one of each gender rather than because you now have a
son. I suspect that most people would
ask you the same questions if you'd brought three sons into the world before
giving birth to your first daughter, especially given that big families are
very challenging these days.
There are a small number in society, however, that still
subscribe to the notion that a son has the important task of carrying on the
name or family lineage. Like it or not,
that is how a paternal society works, and that's what we live in.
I have one point to make regarding the Baptist
Convention. Although I am not in full
agreement with their proposed position, I think you overstated it. Even if your contention is correct, though, I
don't think that this is being proposed because Baptists believe men are
"better". I believe that this
is an example of a small group within a larger one grasping for something that
will bring society as a whole back to a "better" time with family structure and basic
ethics. People like to look back to the
"good ole days" and reminisce about how wonderful it would be to have
that back.
Even if you accept that days past provided a
"better" quality of life, however, their stance misses because today's
technological and global civilization has advanced too far to inject one dose
of the glorious past. Besides, a change
in how women should behave toward men isn't going to eradicate the rampant
adultery, lying, cheating, and child neglect until we each decide within
ourselves that these things are bad and that having the biggest television or
the hottest car simply isn't important.
And on women and today, it is undeniable that women have and
continue to reach more successful and powerful positions even in the short time
that I have been in the corporate environment.
I personally believe, however, that most discussions regarding women
relative to men typically tend to end up in the same convoluted corner. In fact, I think your title is the first
problem with this column.
First of all, to be equal suggests being the same. Men and women are not the same and will never
be, and so they will never be equal (and that is just fine with me). And I'd like to know what the universally
accepted definition of "better" is.
There simply isn't a universally accepted definition of
"better", but even your commentary suggests that better means more
financially and politically powerful.
There is one truth about women and men and the arguments
relating to them that can never be disputed - women give birth. Regardless of how any society wants to deal
with men and women and "equality", the women have to be the ones who
give birth. And after giving birth,
there are biological, chemical, and psychological needs that only the mother
can provide to an infant. This will always create issues relating to
career-paths and attaining the same level of "success" in the workplace
in the same period of time that a man achieves it.
It admittedly frustrates me, though, that the incredible
importance and value of motherhood gets squashed by statistical measures of
"success" and what "better" means as it relates to women
and men. It almost inevitably gets tied
to a financial or political measuring stick. When all is said and done, who
cares what the numbers say.
Stephen Schrader,
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